I’m sorry i’m such an inconvience

I’m sorry i’m such an inconvenience to you

Trust me, I wish I could do what normal people can too

I wish I could drive, I wish I could work, I wish I could go places alone

I wish I wasn’t constantly stuck home

I hate having to depend on everyone just to survive

The guilt and shame I have because of it makes me want to die

I hate that I make things so much harder for you

I wish you didn’t have to do the things I ask you to

But unfortunately my body and mind are just not alright

They don’t work like yours do, I always have to fight

And because of that simple tasks for you, are hard for me

I really just wish you would understand that and see

That i’m doing the best that I can

Trying my hardest to function

But most days are still tough and there are things I just can’t do

Still, I’m sorry i’m such an inconvenience to you

I know this poem is shorter then most of mine on here and maybe one day i’ll go back and revise/add to it but right now, I needed to just get my feelings out. When you live with mental and chronic illnesses that limit your abilities, it is very easy to feel like a failure and an inconvenience to the ones around you. It’s even easier when the people you have to depend on seem aggravated or annoyed when you ask them to do something, such as drive you to an appointment. My illnesses prevent me from being able to drive or go anywhere alone. This unfortunately has created many issues within my life and one incident recently is what inspired me to write the poem above.

I don’t want to be like this. I wish every day I could just be normal but that isn’t my life and I need to cope with that. I don’t think I will ever stop feeling like an inconvenience but reminding myself that I am loved and that I am enough helps some. So my message today is simply if you feel like this, please remember that you are not alone and that the people in your life love you. I know how hard it can be to deal with toxic manipulators, especially when they are your own family members, but just lean on the friends and family in your life who truly love you for the imperfectly perfect person you are and I promise you things will get better in time. ❤

Stay strong my beautiful darlings

Kaylee D. ❤

Published by

Chronically Kaylee

Welcome to my lifestyle blog centered around living your life with chronic and mental illness💜 Wifey since 10/28/18💙 Lupus & Fibromyalgia fighter🦋 Anxiety & Borderline Personality Disorder warrior Handler to service floof in training Blue "Don't be ashamed of your story, for it has the power to inspire others"

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