Hello my beautiful darlings!
In one of my recent posts, I talked all about Borderline Personality Disorder and shared for the first time my story of living with such a complex illness. In that post, I focused on the hardships and the negative side of living with BPD but I didn’t really talk about the positive traits that can come with having BPD. So since today is the last day of May and therefore the last day of Borderline Personality Disorder awareness month, I figured we could wrap up the month with a post talking about 7 positive traits that can be found in people who have Borderline Personality Disorder.
Trait # 1: We are very creative
Many people with BPD channel their pain and struggles into their art. We tend to be very creative people who find joy in an artistic field. This may be acting, dancing, singing, crafting, painting, writing and really any activity where you can express yourself. For me, I’ve always enjoyed acting, singing, photography and crafting but my number one creative outlet is definitely writing. Writing is not only a safe haven for me but a way for me to truly channel everything I have gone through and turn that pain into something beautiful. It’s a way for me to let others know what I am going through when spoken words fail me. Not only do I love to write poetry and blog posts, but I also love writing fiction novels and coming up with new story ideas. When I can just sit down and write, it’s like the rest of the world disappears for a while and everything I am going through, doesn’t matter. All that matters is filling the blank page in front of me with the words in my mind and on my heart. For me, writing is an escape from my reality. My number one dream that has never changed is to become an author one day. Something that sticks with me still to this day was my English teacher in high school telling me that “she can’t wait to see my book on a shelf” after reading the story I had to write for an assignment. On days where I doubt myself, and trust me there are many, her words stay with me and give me the hope and strength to keep writing. When I look at my life, I know I wouldn’t probably be able to write half as good if I didn’t experience the things I went through.
Trait # 2: We are intuitive and highly perceptive
People with BPD tend to know exactly how someone is feeling without them having to say a word. We have a way of being able to read facial expressions and tone of voice and can often notice even the slightest change in mood. We also tend to notice if something is said with an underlying meaning or tension. My friends have always said that they can’t hide how they are feeling around me because as soon as I see them, I just know if something is wrong. We also tend to have a higher understanding of the phrase, “You never know what someone is going through on the inside”. People with BPD understand that even when they are going through unimaginable pain, on the outside they look perfectly fine. We know that invisible illnesses exist and just because someone looks happy and healthy, doesn’t mean they aren’t struggling. This causes us to always be kind and also reach out to people who are suffering but scared to get help.
Trait #3: We are highly empathetic and compassionate
Many people who have BPD are also empaths. I won’t get into what an empath is too much here because i’m planning on doing an entire blog post about that topic in the future but basically an empath is someone who feels others emotions so strongly, as if they were their own. As soon as I walk into the room, it’s like I can read the energy and the energy also can affect me. This is a gift and a curse. To feel so strongly that you can actually feel others pain truly is something that, in a way, is magical. It provides you with a whole new understanding and outlook on human emotions. But it’s also hard because negative energy takes a toll on your mind, body and soul. It can be downright exhausting depending on the circumstance. My friends also know that they can come to me and talk about anything and i’ll always be there for them. People with BPD know what it is like to be in pain and feel like they are alone in this world. They don’t want the people they love to feel like that so often, they are very compassionate and always eager and willing to help a friend.
Trait #4: We are highly passionate and when we love, we love deep
Borderline Personality Disorder is all about intense emotions but this doesn’t just apply to the negative ones. That means we also experience happiness, excitedness and love very strongly. When someone with BPD truly loves someone and feels safe with that person, there is nothing he or she will not do for that person. They will go to the end of the earth to give that person everything they believe they deserve. We are very loyal and committed to the people we love and will be there for them no matter what. We also tend to be very passionate people who will put our whole heart and soul into what we love. This is why many people who have BPD, if they are well enough to have a job and love that job, are amazing workers because they are very dedicated to their craft.
Trait #5: We see the beauty of the world
Most people with BPD have been through unimaginable pain but still are able to smile. Because of the pain, people with BPD tend to be able to appreciate the little things in life. To them, any bright moment in their life is one to hold on to and is usually felt at an intense level. We tend to focus on those small details that help remind us, even in our darkest times, that life is still beautiful. People with BPD also understand the importance of slowing down and truly appreciating life in the moment. When you live with such a traumatic past and uncertain future, it’s important to be able to focus on the here and now. Someone with BPD knows at any moment, their mood can shift and/or their life can change. They know it’s important to savor the moment and truly appreciate the fact that, at this time in their lives, they are loved, they are breathing, and things are okay. People with BPD usually understand the importance of living in the present.
Trait #6: We are insightful and eager to help others
Once someone with BPD acknowledges that they have this disorder and begin to receive treatment, they often become very attuned with their mental health. Many people who have BPD are eager to spread the word and raise awareness for this disorder. They often are very interested in learning about their illness and letting other people know the complexity of living with BPD. A lot of people who have BPD will become advocates for the disorder and mental health in general because they understand how crucial it is for awareness to be raised.
Trait #7: We are resilient and strong
To live with BPD, you have to be strong. Many people with BPD have been through unspeakable things and have to fight every single day just to function, just to survive while looking completely healthy on the outside. We have to deal with the negative stigma Borderline has in society, as well as many people judging us and making us out to be these awful people that we are not. People with BPD are some of the strongest people out there because we had no choice but to be strong. Not only will someone with BPD show strength in themselves, but we will show strength for the people we love. We will stick up for the ones we love and fight for them, no matter what. People with BPD are not these weak, broken individuals the media often makes us out to be, but instead very strong people who constantly fight a battle we never asked to be a part of.
So there you have it, 7 positive traits that come with having BPD. I hope through this post I showed all of you once again that people with BPD are not monsters but instead misunderstood men and women dealing with deep childhood wounds. I also hope I showed that even though having BPD is a very rough disorder to go through, that there is some light and not everything related to having BPD is negative. When I look at my life and the traits that I have, I smile knowing that something so dark within my life can result in some pretty amazing qualities that shape the girl I am. I am not ashamed of my BPD and am learning more and more everyday on how to embrace this disorder and only hope I can help others out there who are struggling to do the same. As always, hold onto hope and remember that life may be difficult but it still can be beautiful.
Until next time,
Kaylee D. ❤